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Posts for tag: behavior

By contactus@priority-pediatrics.com
November 06, 2018
Category: Discipline
Tags: parenting   discipline   behavior   Punishment   Spanking   aggression   defiance   timeout   corporal   hitting  
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Parents should not spank their children, the American Academy of Pediatrics said on Monday in its most strongly worded policy statement warning against the harmful effects of corporal punishment in the home.

The group, which represents about 67,000 doctors, also recommended that pediatricians advise parents against the use of spanking, which it defined as “noninjurious, openhanded hitting with the intention of modifying child behavior,” and said to avoid using nonphysical punishment that is humiliating, scary or threatening.

“One of the most important relationships we all have is the relationship between ourselves and our parents, and it makes sense to eliminate or limit fear and violence in that loving relationship,” said Dr. Robert D. Sege, a pediatrician at Tufts Medical Center and the Floating Hospital for Children in Boston, and one of the authors of the statement.

The academy’s new policy, which will be published in the December issue of the journal Pediatrics, updates 20-year-old guidance on discipline that recommended parents be “encouraged” not to spank. The organization’s latest statement stems from a body of research that was unavailable two decades ago.

 

2016 analysis of multiple studies, for example, found that children do not benefit from spanking.

“Certainly you can get a child’s attention, but it’s not an effective strategy to teach right from wrong,” Dr. Sege said.

Recent studies have also shown that corporal punishment is associated with increased aggression and makes it more likely that children will be defiant in the future. Spanking alone is associated with outcomes similar to those of children who experience physical abuse, the new academy statement says.

There are potential ramifications to the brain as well: A 2009 study of 23 young adults who had repeated exposure to harsh corporal punishment found reduced gray matter volume in an area of the prefrontal cortex that is believed to play a crucial role in social cognition. Those exposed to harsh punishment also had a lower performance I.Q. than that of a control group.

Although the study was small in scope, it can help provide a biological basis for other observations about corporal punishment, Dr. Sege said.

So what is the best way to discipline children? That largely depends on the age and temperament of the child, experts say.

 

Effective discipline involves practicing empathy and “understanding how to treat your child in different stages in development to teach them how to cool down when things do get explosive,” said Dr. Vincent J. Palusci, a child abuse pediatrician at Hassenfeld Children’s Hospital at N.Y.U. Langone.

The academy’s parenting website, HealthyChildren.org, offers tips for disciplining younger and older children. Rewarding positive behavior, using timeouts and establishing a clear relationship between behavior and consequences can all be effective strategies.

“We can’t just take away spanking,” Dr. Palusci said. “We have to give parents something to replace it with.”

The number of parents who spank their children has been on the decline. A 2013 Harris Poll of 2,286 adults surveyed online found 67 percent of parents said they had spanked their children and 33 percent had not. In 1995, however, 80 percent of parents said they had spanked their children while 19 percent said they had not.

Attitudes about spanking are also changing. Although seven in 10 adults in the United States agreed a “good, hard spanking is sometimes necessary to discipline a child,” according to the 2014 General Social Survey, spanking has become less popular over time.

In 1970, Fitzhugh Dodson, a clinical psychologist and best-selling author of books on parenting, was quoted in The New York Times as saying that many discipline problems could be solved by using his “pow wow approach.”

“It’s my pow, followed by his wow,” he explained, demonstrating how he would swat a child’s bottom.

“I know some books say parents shouldn’t spank, but I think it’s a mistake,” he said. “A poor mother is left with nowhere to go. She’s mad at the kid, has had it up to the eyebrows with him, and longs to give him a big smack on the behind, but she’s been told she shouldn’t. She should, and it’s good for her, because it releases her tension. And the child definitely prefers it to long parental harangues.”

 

And in the 1945 edition of “Baby and Child Care,” Dr. Benjamin Spock said spanking “is less poisonous than lengthy disapproval, because it clears the air, for parents and child.” (In the ’80s, however, he changed his mind.)

Today, most doctors don’t support it.

recent survey of 1,500 pediatricians in the United States found that 74 percent did not approve of spanking and 78 percent thought spanking never or seldom improved children’s behavior.

It’s a different situation among legislators and school administrators. Although corporal punishment in public schools is not permitted in 31 states and the District of Columbia, there are 19 states, mainly in the South, that either allow the practice or do not have specific rules prohibiting it.

In 2000, the academy recommended that corporal punishment in schools be abolished in all states. And in 2016, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention published a tool kit for preventing child abuse and neglect that highlighted a need for legislation to end corporal punishment.

But attempts to do so at the federal level have failed.

“I think people see school discipline and parental discipline very differently,” said Elizabeth T. Gershoff, a professor at the University of Texas at Austin who has studied corporal punishment in public schools.

Even so, she added, it’s possible the new academy statement could lead to change down the road.

“It shows we are seeing the beginning of a shift away from believing it is O.K. to hit children in the name of discipline,” she said.

Children “need to know that you have their best interests at heart,” Dr. Gershoff said. “If the kid doesn’t trust the parent, then they’re never going to want to do what they say.”

By contactus@priority-pediatrics.com
July 31, 2018
Category: Books
Tags: parenting   behavior   Guide   ADD   ADHD  
Parental Involvement
Parents of children with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder are constantly asking teachers what they can do to manage their child’s behavior at home and support their child’s success at school. The Parent’s Guide to Attention Deficit Disorder (390 pages, © 1995) provides logical and useful suggestions for those parents who have been searching for solutions to their child’s problems. Using the same format as the most successful intervention manuals Hawthorne has developed for educators, parents now have hundreds of suggestions available to them to help their child who has an Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder. The guide is based on behaviors from the Home Versionof the Attention Deficit Disorder Evaluation Scale - Fourth Edition and is easily referenced by the categories of Inattentive and Hyperactive-Impulsive. The Parent’s Guide to Attention Deficit Disorder has been expanded to include 144 additional behaviors.

 

This Guide is available on Amazon.com.

2nd edition © 1995) provides logical and useful suggestions for those parents who have been searching for solutions to their child's problems. Using the same format as the most successful intervention manuals Hawthorne has developed for educators, parents now have hundreds of suggestions available to them to help their child who has an Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder.

 

By contactus@priority-pediatrics.com
July 31, 2018
Category: Books
Tags: parenting   behavior   Guide   Solutions   Home  

PARENT’S GUIDE
Solutions to Today’s Most Common Behavior Problems in the Home

 

by Stephen B. McCarney, Ed.D. &
Angela M. Bauer, M.Ed.

© 1990

 

This is one of the most valuable resources available for today’s parents.

Item #01300

The Parent’s Guide is a collection of specific strategies for the 102 most common behavior problems encountered in and around the home. This is one of the most comprehensive guides available for parents to improve parenting skills by providing positive interventions to remediate the behavior problems of children and youth. The Parent’s Guideis the perfect resource for parents of special needs children, foster parents, adoptive parents, or any parent/guardian who wishes to improve his or her skills in coping with the demands of raising children today. As parents and guardians use the Parent’s Guide, their skills will improve as they apply the specific intervention strategies to behavior problems encountered in the home environment. 
The user-friendly format of the Parent’s Guide (240 pages, © 1990) will prove much more useful and convenient than other resources on the subject because the guide was developed to respond to the need to know what to do - NOW. The Parent’s Guide reduces the need for costly and time-consuming training programs by placing an authoritative resource in the hands and homes of parents where it is most needed.

 

Characteristics of The Parent’s Guide 

The Parent’s Guide 

  • contains strategies for dealing with the 102 most common behavior problems around the home,
     
  • has a comprehensive listing of strategies that allows parents/guardians to select the specific strategies which are most likely to be successful, 
     
  • is individualized, and
     
  • is used by parents or guardians in the home environment.

 

01300
Parent's Guide
$25.00

 

Also available on Amazon.com.

By contactus@priority-pediatrics.com
March 01, 2018
Category: Uncategorized
Tags: discipline   behavior   Time Out   Punishment   Mistakes  

Common Time-Out Mistakes and How to Solve Them

Could this classic discipline technique actually make the situation worse? Learn what experts recommend, including a new and improved five-step technique for giving time-outs.

 

Time-out certainly sounds like a brilliant fix: A child spends a few minutes sitting alone, and emerges calm and cooperative. Parents often admit that it simply doesn’t work—because their kid fights going to the time-out, cries and calls out instead of sitting quietly, or gets even more worked up afterward. However, according to a recent study from Oregon Health and Science University in Portland, 85 percent of parents who use the strategy make mistakes that can reduce its success, such as giving too many warnings or talking to their kids or letting them play with toys during time-outs. If you’re ready to become a time-out dropout, consider when they will be most effective and how you can adopt other tactics to quell your kid’s antics.

Where did time-out come from?

Time-outs became popularized by reality shows like Supernanny, but the technique was first developed in the 1960s as a more humane alternative to harsh punishments that were common then. Before Arthur Staats, Ph.D., now retired from the University of Hawaii at Manoa, came up with the concept, teachers and principals routinely smacked children with rulers, and parents spanked or whipped their kids with switches. Now—at a time when a video of a kid being paddled at school goes viral because it’s so shocking—most parents are embracing a more gentle approach. After all, decades of research have shown that children who have been routinely spanked are more likely to be aggressive when they get older, as well as to suffer from anxiety, depression, and substance abuse. 

But a time-out isn’t benign either. “When your child has a tantrum or a meltdown, she may be overwhelmed and unable to control her emotions,” says Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., professor of psychiatry at UCLA School of Medicine and author of No-Drama Discipline. Rather than immediately sending her to a chair in the corner, it’s important to let her know that you empathize with how she’s feeling. Says Dr. Siegel, “Your child actually needs you the most when she’s at her worst.” Most experts believe time-outs can be effective, as long as they are used correctly and in the right situations, especially for kids who are over age 3. “They should be reserved for particular offenses that could cause injury to your child or someone else,” says Parents advisor Ari Brown, M.D., a pediatrician and author of Toddler 411

Time-Out Mistakes

1. Using Them Too Often

Despite popular belief, time-outs aren’t supposed to be about getting children to think through their misdeeds. “A time-out is primarily a ‘Let’s stop things from getting worse’ strategy,” says Eileen Kennedy-Moore, Ph.D., a Parents advisor and author of Raising Emotionally and Socially Healthy Kids. Dr. Kennedy-Moore explains, “In the history of the universe, no children have ever gone to their rooms to ‘Think about what you did!’ They’re thinking about their parents’ meanness. The learning starts after the time-out, when you can say, ‘Okay, let’s try again.’ ” 

2. Giving Kids Attention During Time-Out

A time-out is essentially a mild consequence. Young kids crave attention, and even negative attention may suffice, explains Dr. Kennedy-Moore. In fact, “time-out” was originally short for “time-out from positive reinforcement,” because Dr. Staats felt that paying attention to a child’s misbehavior can encourage him to misbehave more. “To me, time-out isn’t a naughty chair or a corner of the room,” says Dr. Brown. “It’s simply the lack of parental attention for a short period of time that lets a child see that his behavior led to losing attention instead of getting it.”

3. Using Them for the Wrong Reason

Research from Oklahoma State University, in Stillwater, has found that time-outs work best on young children who are oppositional and defiant by hitting or intentionally doing the opposite of what you ask, but only if you first try milder responses most of the time. When a child is put in a time-out for different types of problems or if it’s used too often for oppositional defiance, his behavior may get worse, says study coauthor Robert E. Larzelere, Ph.D., professor of family science. Little kids who are just whining about the mashed potatoes or negotiating for more iPad time respond better to other approaches. In those types of situations, consider these tactics instead:

Alternatives to Time-Out

  • Identify and reinforce positive opposite behaviors, such as playing gently and speaking kindly, suggests Mandi Silverman, Psy.D., a clinical psychologist in the ADHD and Behavior Disorders Center at the Child Mind Institute, in New York City. Praise or offer rewards for these behaviors, saying, “Wow, you are playing so nicely with your toys” or giving your child stars or stickers.
  • Use when-then statements. Instead of telling your child, “We can stay at the playground for five more minutes, but only if you put your shoes back on,” you can motivate her to cooperate by saying, “When you put your shoes back on, then we can stay at the playground for five more minutes.” 
  • Strike when the iron is cold. After everyone has had a chance to cool down, you can explain, “We don’t throw toys because throwing toys is dangerous.” 

The New and Improved Time-Out Technique

If you ask parents how they use time-outs, you’ll probably hear a wide variety of answers, ranging from having a naughty chair to keeping kids in their room. Since Dr. Staats first wrote about time-outs, researchers have changed them for the better, so they’re both gentler and more effective. 

  • Step 1: Give one clear warning. The best study found that a single non-repetitive warning before every time-out can reduce the number of time-outs needed by 74 percent, says Dr. Larzelere. If your child doesn’t start cooperating within five seconds, proceed with the time-out.
  • Step 2: Announce a time-out. You might wait until your child is relatively calm, but briefly reiterate what he did wrong (“No hitting. Time-out.”), and escort him to a naughty chair. (Many experts advise against sending your child to his room, because he’ll have toys, books, and other fun things there.) Resist the urge to lecture him. It’s okay to offer an explanation before the time-out or after it, but not during it. If you say things like, “I’ve told you about this a thousand times,” “Now you are paying the price,” or “I hope you are thinking about what you did,” you are giving your child attention rather than removing it—and any attention, even negative attention, can act as a reward rather than a consequence. 
  • Step 3: Start the clock. Dr. Staats originally suggested keeping kids in a time-out until they stopped fussing, even if that took a half hour. Today, many parents use the “one minute for every year of a child’s age” rule. However, recent research done by Timothy Vollmer, Ph.D., professor of psychology at the University of Florida in Gainesville, shows that even brief time-outs of one to three minutes are effective, at least for children ages 3 to 5. Setting the clock for longer may make it harder to get your child to sit in a time-out in the future.
  • Step 4: Make it boring. During the time-out, do not talk to your child or make eye contact. Staying silent may require some practice, especially if your child says things like, “You are the worst mom in the world!” or asks questions like, “Why are you doing this to me?” and “Can I have a glass of water?” No matter what your child says or asks during the time-out, ignore it. 
  • Step 5: When the timer goes off, call an end to the time-out. It doesn’t matter if your child is still fidgety, sassy, or crying. Once the timer goes off, the time-out is over, Dr. Vollmer says. How will you know if time-outs are working? If you start following these steps, within one to three weeks you should need to employ them less and less often. Says Dr. Larzelere, “When you call for a time-out and mean what you say, children will learn to listen.”

What If My Child Refuses to Go to Time-Out?

  1. Present a choice. He can cooperate or lose a privilege, such as screen time. If he chooses not to have a time-out, say, “Okay, then it’s no TV,” and walk away. 
  2. Offer time off for good behavior. You might say, “Time-out is normally three minutes, but if you go now and sit quietly, it will be two.” 
  3. Take it yourself. If your child is safe being unsupervised (or another adult is there), go to your own room. Or say, “I will not talk to you for three minutes because you hit your brother.” 
By contactus@priority-pediatrics.com
January 28, 2017
Category: Books

I've always thought that How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk is an excellent book about the basics of discipline and communication. This is a good read for all families.  Dr. T